Climbing a hill of scree


Have you ever thought you have cracked it, left it alone for a while then revisit it only to discover you now know less than when you started. This seems to be happening to me quite a lot recently.

Perhaps I’m noticing things more as I become more aware.

The funny thing is that it doesn’t scare me anymore, I’m enjoying the discoveries and relearning what I thought I’d learnt. It is like watching a movie for the second time or reading a book again. The first time around I get to understand the story then I get understand what it is really about the second time around. Learning is the same, when learning is put into practice the gaps appear in the learning, this is a normal cycle, it gives the opportunity to learn more so that the gaps can be filled.

The training i’ve been doing for the past few year is sort of like this but the opposite, I’ve been unlearning things that I’ve learnt over my many years. Unlearning the things that have got me in the way of myself.

Beliefs that I’m not good enough, a full package of anxiety, worrying what other people think, second guessing others, butting in on conversations, etc etc.

Peeling of the layers of anxiety, second guessing is a hard journey, it takes as long as it takes, unlearning and then more unlearning as the gaps appear.

It’s like climbing a hill of scree, three steps up and slide down two steps. It is only my attention to the detail and my intention to succeed that helps my anxiety to diminish.

I’ve got tools and techniques that I have learnt that are successful for me perhaps they may be of help to. Why not learn more? 

 

 

 

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