Alexander Technique

Is the Alexander Technique for everyone?


Of course I would say yes, the Alexander Technique has helped me immensely, I manage asthma without drugs, my depression and anxiety is much reduced and when they flare up I have the tools to snip them in the bud. Asthma, depression and anxiety are now managed with the tools I’ve learnt through the Alexander Technique, so go course the Alexander Technique is for everyone.

I do have a ‘but’.

If you believe that the world, your society, your family is responsible for your behaviours, whether good or bad behaviours then perhaps the Alexander Technique isn’t for you.

If you believe you have a right to an easy life and other must support your dream, then perhaps the Alexander Technique isn’t for you.

If you discover these dreams and believes don’t work for you anymore and want to discover something different then the Alexander Technique could be for you.

Learning to increase your awareness of yourself and your surroundings isn’t hard to learn however if your ego thinks otherwise it is extremely hard to learn as your ego will stop you. Egos are strange things, they just want to be in control and keep on doing the same other thing whether it is good or bad for you.

Egos like to be in charge.

What the Alexander Technique will teach you is that you have choices, one action may be the egos way however you have more choices that may lead to other actions. These other actions will probably be better than the good old ego way.

From my self discovery, asthma, depression and anxiety were my ego’s way to ‘help’ me cope with life. This helped years ago: I got breathless, then I didn’t need to go the school and got lots of love from my mother. What a fantastic plan for a child, lots of love and skived from school.

A win win situation.

This successful plan then morphed in to other uses, mostly successfully, I didn’t do what I didn’t want to do. Win win again.

This win win plan morphed into something horrible.

I could leave my house without using my asthma pump at the door and a few more to get to the car.

My life stopped.

I’ve thought about this for a long time, distilling my actions down to a simple recipe; I don’t want to do something, seek approval and get lots of love from the person you love, repeat when desired.

I was exercising my right to have an easy life and relying on the support of others. This is OK as child but as an adult!

What the Alexander Technique has taught me is the fundamental rule that I must first love myself before I can love anyone or anything else. As with learning anything new, the route to understanding is a contorted twisted maze of dead ends that must be visited before you can discover the centre of the truth. Then you can use all the dead ends to mix with the truth to have your own wisdom of what love is.

If you want to let go of your childish ways then perhaps the Alexander Technique is a way to discovery yourself. As Rudyard Kipling wrote –

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,   

    And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

‘If’ Rudyard Kipling
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/46473/if—
Alexander Technique

What is the Alexander Technique?


I’ve written what it is many times, yesterday I explained that it is teaching co-ordination, co-ordination of the whole human entity with all its boundaries, all the boundaries you care to know or think about and some you didn’t know existed.

It’s the co-ordination that you wish you can have so that you can be better at whatever you aspire to be.

Many of us spend many years and a lot of money to learn how to do something, perhaps your job, vocation, or you hobby. The list is endless; sports, musician, actor, poet, writer, doctor, nurse, dentist, lecturer, decorator, chef, hula hoop maker… . The list is endless, we are all trained in some activity that would benefit with better co-ordination.

This improved co-ordination is what the Alexander Technique teaches.

Improving your co-ordination by teaching you how to be in balance with whatever you want to do and whomever you want to communicate or interact with.

The art is noticing how you are reacting instead of being in autopilot. Taking more control of your reactions your performance will improve.

The by-products of improved co-ordination are that pain will soften and may eventually disappear, you will be happier, there will be more time in your day.

You will feel great!

Why not give it a try, if you don’t like feeling free, almost weightless, brighter and happier this is not for you but then again you will never know until you try it. Unfortunately words can’t describe the freedom and aliveness that being in co-ordination brings.

Alexander Technique

At the Dentist


Do you ever feel light and free when you meet a someone; something strange happens, sort of lightness, some sort of connection. Sometimes it’s the other way, you get heavy and morose, maybe somewhere on you body gets more painful.

Like it or not we all need the company of others, sometimes you may get stuck in a relationship with negative vibes. It’s not nice, you are on your toes all the time waiting for criticism, evolving and developing your anxiety and depression, you may start to believe that everyone is like this and it becomes the norm!

I lived like this for many years.

Slowly I’ve changed to being on the light and free, I have positive vibes! I can quickly go negative, it was my norm for a long time, I now have tools so the I can notice and quickly turn around.

Yesterday I went to the dentist; the last appointment to fit a crown. I’d spoken to the dentist previously about helping the surgery staff with their aches and pains so this visit I brought my sales letter, its first time in action. I printed three copies, my plan was two copies for the dentist and one for the receptionist.

I was on time but the dentist was late, so I had the opportunity to pass my sales letter to the receptionist, explained what its about; noticing habits and making choices, increasing awareness in everything you do. She commented on her lower back pain, we continued talking about her previous work and other things, I quietly and consciously increased my awareness whilst chatting, she copied the awareness without knowing. After a few minutes I asked about her lower back pain, she was shocked that it had diminish.

“How did you do that!” she said, “It’s magic, can other people do this? Why doesn’t anybody know about the Alexander Technique?”

The thing is most people can have this awareness but they choose not to. It’s not a real choice as you have been steered and trained to behave in a particular way by your family, friends, enemies, colleagues and almost anywhere you can think of.

You have a particular response to a particular stimulus that is particular to you. I didn’t like paper tissues as many years ago some stuck to my face, it’s only recently, 50 or so years after the event that I can now use tissues. You may have one or many responses similar to my paper tissue response.

What changed my life is firstly coming across the Alexander Technique and then training to be a Alexander Technique teacher, which I’ve almost completed.
Learning the skills to be present and a heightened awareness, the observational skills using my senses, not just my sight and hearing, so that I can observe others habits. there is also the connection between the client or group of clients and myself, not pushy, not soft, somewhere in the middle that allows an open communication that goes both ways. All this takes time, anguish, frustration, noticing habits and letting them go is difficult, well it was for me!

Now here’s an offer, whilst I’m still training I’m offering you free sessions, firstly to practice my skills, I’ve already worked with over a hundred different clients and secondly to get the Alexander Technique out in the world. Don’t worry if you can’t see me in person, we can always work over internet with a video link.

Any takers?

happiness, mindfulness, present, wellbeing

The Outer Hebrides


The weather in the UK has been dreadful for June, inches of rain well above the average. But not where I was, I’ve just come back from a fortnight in the Outer Hebrides to the west of the Scottish mainland. The weather was very changeable and I would lie if I said it didn’t rain, it was mostly sunny with passing clouds. Each time we arrived at our destination the sun appeared. The main issue was the sun or rather daylight, in June the sun goes below the horizon for a few hours but there is still daylight a sort of bright dusk that then moves into a bright dawn. I’m not complaining as I’ve been this far north before in June; I enjoy it but it gets tiring, learning to sleep when light is burning through the curtains is an art.

Kentallen, south of Fort William

Changing sleeping habits is like any other change, firstly you need notice there is something to change and then it’s something you want to change.

Acceptance of the change will then naturally follow.

My difficulty was, I didn’t know what time it was, I haven’t worn a watch for quite some time and being on holiday there was no rigour of working. Normal things that communicate time where missing, we didn’t watch TV; well, just a bit at the end of the day. When travelling in the car we were listening to audio books most of the time instead of the radio so most of our time references had disappeared. Incidentally as I didn’t have a handle on time I enjoyed very long days of daylight.

Loch Seaforth, the view from our room!

Time could have been something I wanted to manage, become regimented and do particular things at particular times, I chose to ignore what time it was and enjoy each day as each moment appeared and moved on.

Be warned – cafes and restaurants do have opening and closing times, we nearly were too late a couple of times as we thought it was about 12:30 and it was just before 3pm!

It was my birthday whilst on at North Uist, yes another one!
My wife did her usual fantastic research and we had a delicious meal; we were on time for this, though Alistair our taxi driver for the evening took his time driving to and from the restaurant. The taxi journey is another story for another day.

oops all gone

As with everything, it is how I approach something will effect how I behave. I decided to


  • enjoy the weather as it changed, as they say where there is wet weather, there is nothing wrong with the weather but there is a problem with the clothes your are wearing.

  • Not to worry about not getting to sleep because it is still light.

  • Not to worry about time except when I needed to

I enjoyed my holiday, all in all a fantastic time in the Outer Hebrides. It felt like it was far longer then the two weeks perhaps that was because I hadn’t a care what time it was.

A special thanks to my wonderful wife who arranged everything.

and we saw Golden Eagles in flight
Alexander Technique

Inspired by women


I’ve been inspired by a couple women very recently, in fact last night and today. There are other women who keep me on the straight and narrow over the last few years, one of them is of course my wife.

Yesterday I was planned to do a presentation to the Gloucester FHT Support Group about the Alexander Technique, this was postponed from a previous date. I guess the cancellation and new date didn’t suit every one, in fact no one turned up except Harriet, who organised the workshop. I suggested as we are here I could do practice my workshop with here. She didn’t know much about the Alexander Technique, I started with the question; “what is the Alexander Technique, any answer is the right one as long as it’s honest”. The range of answers are alway interesting; from I haven’t a clue, to, something about posture, to, comprehensive answers about choices and consciousness.

They then move from their natural poise to a soldier on parade, they think they need to do something in their explanation.

She wasn’t so different something about bones, posture and neck then stretching to be a soldier.

What amazed me is that Harriet got what I was teaching her very quickly, she changed in front of my eyes, she told me she thought she was free and present before we started then she discovered that there is another level to it all.

We are now planning for another workshop later this year.

The other woman I met today was Patricia Maddalena who presented at a workshop I decided to go to at the list moment, I was late, may be purposely, something was drawing me there but I was reluctant to go. The topic was ” How to be a money generator” I normally don’t like this type of presentation however Patricia was engaging and very good, everything was said from the heart, she has had a rag to riches growth in the past 5 years. Not much was said about money, nothing like; if you follow my plan you’ll be millionaires next week. Simple down to earth stuff, believe in yourself, remodel your thinking and let the past go. Don’t think in the future tense, think and talk about now, equally modelling the past to what’s going to happen in the future, change it to what is happening now.

What really shocked me were a couple of things, her vibrancy, love and compassion, and this was the first time she had presented to a group for an hour and she over ran by a couple of minutes.

Both women have stopped me in my tracks for the similar thing, allow themselves to trust themselves, listen to themselves and good things will manifest; Harriet for trusting in me and showing her that she has more freedom and ease to rediscover in herself. Patricia in noticing that she can let go of her limiting beliefs and thrive as much as she wants and also share her discoveries with love and compassion to all whomever wants to listen.

And she wore these shoes! Aren’t they great.

Alexander Technique

No more reading between the lines!


I may have maligned the working class but I guess everyone who loses the trust of someone, loses trust in what that person says and then they read between the lines to ensure their own survival. Unfortunately the way our brains work we may well transpose the lack of trust onto somebody else that has what your brains think have similar attributes to the person we originally lost trust with. We do this all the time, it is part of out nature to ensure that we can survive. It is the immediate response to someone we meet for the first time, sometimes we utterly trust the person, sometimes we have no trust, our gut feeling tells us so.

As with everything we have choices, let your gut tell you who to like or not, your gut may well be telling the truth, or tell yourself that you have never met this person before and start with a clean slate. Start with trust, perhaps not fully open trust but enough trust to start a relationship, just because they have similar attributes to someone you didn’t trust doesn’t mean you shouldn’t trust them. Let this person earn your trust, you can only do this with an open heart and an observing mind then your gut will settle. There is another important choice we all make and that is the choice between giving and withholding consent.

  • Giving or withholding your love
  • Giving or withholding your friendship
  • Giving or withholding your time
  • Giving or withholding your connection to others
  • Giving or withholding your touch
  • Giving and withholding consent to yourself

Choosing whether to give or withhold consent takes only a moment, it is just a thought, we even do it to ourselves many times a day; you may be on a diet and you walk down the sugar canyon to the checkout at your store, I guess your consent switches many times with all the temptations whilst you wait to pay. Let’s move on, there’s another blog about sugar, obesity and greed.

Giving and withholding consent sounds very simple to do; there is a warning. It is how you go about it, if you choose out of greed, vengefulness, revenge or to cause pain then you will be hurt others and yourselves, your negativity will flow, if you are doing it to yourself you need to rethink what you are doing.
If you are choosing your consent to help others even if it is out of love I’d suggest that will not help you in the long run, you will be giving too much and eventually wear yourself out.

The only healthy consent is choosing what gives you a healthy boundary between you, yourself and others. You are neither a pusher or grabber or observer in what ever relationship you have. Of course you will tend towards pusher, grabber, observer continually changing in all your relationships. What I ask is for you to notice which one you are in a moment of your choosing, does it feel like a gut feeling, out of love, or is it your mind telling you want to do.
If either gut, heart or mind is overpowering the other two then I suggest that this choice is out of balance. You need to find another way that helps you with your healthy boundary with this relationship.
What helps me is pause for a moment, notice where I am, notice my feet on the floor, my bum on the chair and my arms on the desk as I write, I notice that I’m in balance with gravity, I’m in continual movement and my joints are free to move now. Now I have my attention to myself and surrounding.
I’m now open to giving consent, you may notice, I do, that my head, heart and gut come into sync and the quality of consent is contented. Hopefully that makes sense!

This pausing and resetting is ever so powerful, it give me clarity and finesse in what I give or withhold consent to, I can give or withhold trust in that moment or person because I know what I choose will maintain my health boundary.
With this, there are no more reading between the lines!


Alexander Technique

2018


The end of the year is very near, it’s just a couple of hours away; I’ve been thinking and reflecting on the past year. It’s been a busy year and it has flown by.

The end of the year is very near, it’s just a couple of hours away; I’ve been thinking and reflecting on the past year. It’s been a busy year and it has flown by.

I’ve written 39 blogs, there are a few blogs that may be worth reading again. The first comes to mind is when I visited the vets and I talked to a vet nurse about the Alexander Technique and demonstrated with her and the dogs in the kennels. This is better than smoking dope.

Another blog I liked was when I was in Bordeaux on a Alexander residential course. I discovered the essence of what the Alexander technique is; It’s all about love. I’ve just read it a gain, I was inspired through the work we did there.

In October I was feeling particularly anxious and could sleep so I wrote a blog exactly how I felt at 1AM. I find writing very cathartic, this blog helped me sleep that night.

And finally, yesterday I really enjoyed my coming out, this took a lot of courage and encouragement from a friend for me to write and then to post.

I hope you have enjoyed my blogs over this year and the previous years. I’ve enjoyed writing them and as I wrote above they are very cathartic for me, I’ve also come to learn that many have similar life issues and I’m not alone. I do encourage you to speak, write about the things that are holding you or find someone to help you, obviously I’m biased but find an Alexander Technique teacher to help you to rediscover your ease.

Let us all have a fantastic 2019. Please keep reading, you can always join my mailing list then you’ll get my blogs via email then you won’t miss any.

What was your favourite blog?

Alexander Technique

The Christmas Conundrum; the great expectation!


It’s early on Christmas morning, I wanted to sleep on but the dogs had another ideas or did they sense I’d woken. Anyway I’m up, the dogs have gone out and I’m drinking tea and writing far to early in the Christmas Day morning.

I’ve had many a Christmas morning, firstly with great expectations when I was a child, Santa was going to deliver the toy or game of the year, he didn’t, I got something else not quite what I wanted, I was disappointed but held a brave face; perhaps next year I’ll get what I want.

It never happened.

When I was with my children, they got the toys I’d always wanted and more. Christmas was fantastic but I still had an underlying feeling I didn’t get what I wanted.

Was I chasing a fantasy?

Divorce happened, my children and I separated by distance and financial cost, then parent alienation syndrome cut in and I was well and truly separated, I pined for the Christmas’s I had with my children. Nothing has helped with the sense of loss I’ve had for many years. Christmas has become the focus of my pain of loss. I’ve played games with myself by

  • ignoring Christmas,
  • having extravagant holidays at Christmas,
  • being thoroughly depressed at Christmas
  • being over generous at Christmas

Nothing seems to work, I’m still expecting the great expectation but I don’t know what it is. The separation from my children has made it even worse.

How can I not know what it is if I’m expecting it?

Christmas is a sad time of year as are their birthdays. Christmas is worse as everyone is ‘enjoying themselves’. Not everyone; there are many like me who brave the festive season with stomach churning pain. The pain is the loss and regret of others. This year I’m playing at ignoring Christmas, I’m too old for it, Christmas is for children, Christmas has gone commercialised.

Any excuse to ignore Christmas.

Reflecting on why Christmas is a great expectation. I think it all starts by being told to be good else Santa won’t bring you what you want. I was good and he didn’t, he broke his promise!

As a child my heart was broken every year because my great expectation didn’t materialise. In reality my parents could afford the latest and best presents for their children. Our society and commercialisation has a lot to answer for, I imagine there have been millions of children disappointed on Christmas morning and equally millions of parents spending beyond their means to satisfy the expectations of their children.

I have and you have been caught in the maelstrom of lost expectations that are the promises and dreams of Christmas’s past.

There is a simple present that everyone can have and give if they so wish.

That is love.

These great expectations are expecting something that is not love, the expectations are given in place of love, they are supposed to express love but they are only tangible gifts that can’t support love. They can support a memory of the time the gift is given. Love is in the person not the gift. There is a catch; to offer love you need to love yourself first, you need to be able to look yourself in a mirror without flinching away and tell yourself that you love the person you see in the mirrors reflection.

Loving yourself allows you to love others, then your gifts are tokens of your love.

Great expectations are an expectation of what others will provide you, they will never meet your expectations.

How about having no expectations from others and enjoy the shear joy of receiving their tokens of love.

This is what I’ve done this Christmas morning, it’s been wonderful with tears of joy, love and contentment with no great expectation.

Have a wonderful Christmas and pass your love on to all you know.

Alexander Technique, anxiety

1am


It’s 1am in the morning,

a time I like to be asleep,

I like my 8 hours of sleep a night,

tonight it isn’t going to happen,

I suddenly woke up,

so time for a cup of tea on my own,

even my dogs didn’t stir,

they like their sleep

so do I!

worrying about things wakes me up,

why tonight?

I know why, you don’t need to know.

You need to know this is what anxiety is like

waking up suddenly for no apparent reason

waking up suddenly for a reason I can’t tell you

waking up worried

when the best thing is to sleep

so I’m refreshed to face the worry,

not blurry in the morning

Oh the joys of life when your anxious.

I have tools to help me

But

Sometimes it is best to let anxiety run

The best tool is to talk to someone,

to let it all out

But

At 1am all is peaceful

Except

For me!!!!

Another way is to write about it

So here I am

And

You are here reading my story

Suddenly my stomach pain has subsided

You did that

Thank you.

I’m breathing again

I’m calming down

Time for more tea

My anxiety is calming

So

I can find my balance with gravity

I can find my balance with time

I can let go and be here

so

I can be at one with myself and not thinking ahead of time

That’s what I think anxiety is

Thinking ahead of time.

Thinking ahead of time is a fiction

It’s a waste of time

Being awake at 1am is a waste of sleep

Except for the lovely cup of tea.

Alexander Technique

Being a human being not a human doing


This week is Mental Health week, the hidden pandemic that we don’t like to talk about.

It is great that we can now speak about it but have we done enough, are some of the concerns just false platitudes of people stuck in their own mental health problems.

Suffering from mental health problems is shit; nobody really understands your own unique mental health problems.

There’s lots of help from lots of modalities, all trying to wedge your unique mental health problem into their niche. I may be hard on these wonderful people that have a deep urge to help others.

Remember this in my perspective and I may be completely delusional on this matter. I’m happy to be proved otherwise.

Many modalities are sticking plasters for a headache. They work for a while whilst you believe it is helping you. They add another layer to your thinking to smooth over and hide your personal unique problem. Your personal unique problem will break out of these layers when it needs to; like Dr Ford recently with Kavanaugh.

Plastering over things just postpones the problem, I know because that is what I do, but to a lesser extent now. Now if I feel shit I tell someone, I did this morning, hence this blog, thank you, you know who you are.

What has worked for me is instead of adding layers is removing the layers and meeting my problems naked and vulnerable. It sounds very, very scary; it is the first time and possibly the second time and the third. Now it is joyful, standing naked and vulnerable and letting my problems trying to get to me. (Standing naked is a metaphor; well most of the time, best not done in public!) Opening up to myself and braving my vulnerability is fantastic, terrifying, weird, freeing, stupid, enlightening; initially changing rapidly in the kaleidoscope of my thought. Slowly my thoughts slow to thoughts of freedom and joy, sometimes with tears of joy.
You may think this is mindfulness; it is but a whole lot more. We all have this within us, all we have to do is find it.

It has taken me, since the discovery that I have been suffering from anxiety, about ten years to write this. Some of these years I can’t remember. What I know is that I’ve been trying and trying to resolve and get over my unique personal problem.

Recently I’ve discovered, trying and trying to resolve and getting over my unique personal problem doesn’t work!

I wish I knew that earlier, the answer is not trying and not getting over my unique personal problem. Trying just adds layers to smoother the problem and the problem is me!  I’m trying to hide from myself.

The secret is to be; be yourself, be balanced with gravity, be now, be here, not drifting off somewhere in your thoughts. All this is easier to say than do but doing is the wrong approach, it is being, being a human being not a human doing.

I teach how to be an being, not using unnecessary energy and not being a human doing. The benefits are that life is freer, happier, joyous, loving, beautiful, plentiful, and peaceful. Life is like it is now, the same family and friends but much, much better.

My unique personal problem is still with me as it is me, now we live in harmony with each other. My problem does shout at times for me to do something, now I know how to return to a being.